Did your girlfriend break up with you?  You are not the first guy to go through this.  In fact, girls initiate three quarters of the break ups while guys only dump the girl in one quarter of the situations.  Therefore, guys have to deal with being dumped far more often than girls do.

Compounding the problem is the impression that men are supposed to deal with their emotions stoically.  While women are allowed to dissect every part of their relationship, men are expected to roll with the punches.

But this doesn’t mean that men don’t have emotions.  They hurt when women dump them.  A girlfriend break up is quite painful.

First of all, men tend to place more value on stable relationships than women do.  While a man might be interested in a fling with a woman who is not his girlfriend, what he really wants is someone who will be there in good times and bad.

But, once your girlfriend has dumped you, it’s important to figure out how to pick up the pieces and go on with your life.

First of all, you should find some way to express yourself.  Girls can do this by writing poetry or talking about the relationship endlessly with their friends.  Men often don’t feel comfortable with these options.  But, if you play the guitar or piano, try writing some music that allows you to express your feelings.  Many of the great songs are about the pain of breaking up.

Next, you need to clear out your place of all of the things that remind you of her.  If she has clothes at your house, give them back.  Throw away her toothbrush.  And, if she’s given you any gifts that you want to keep, box them up for the time being until you can look at them without having turbulent emotions.

You will want to close off communications with her, at least for the short term.  If either of you owe the other money, try to settle up so that won’t be an avenue for talking.

Then tell your ex that you want to go silent for a while.  That means no calls, texts, or emails.  Stay off each other’s myspace and facebook pages.  In time, you may be able to be friends again, but right now you both need to give each other the space to heal.

Then, you need to get out of the house.  Make a point of playing pick up basketball with your friends.  Go out to a bar from time to time.  Become a big brother to an underprivileged kid.

Then, start to get back into the dating scene once again.  At first, you can have casual dates that may not lead to anything.  But, over time, you will meet someone you really care about.  And, at that point, you will know that you have some closure about the old relationship.  You won’t be worried about the old girlfriend break up any more.

There are different degrees to a wife led relationship. Many men are content and even thrilled to let the wife take complete control of the relationship. This goes beyond letting her make the decisions, into dominant and submissive behavior. Some men simply allow the wife to make the major decisions and set the tone, without being truly submissive.

To what degree your marriage becomes a wife led relationship is based mostly on both your preferences. Maybe you feel better when she makes the decisions and handles the checkbook. Remember that though you’re allowing her to have that control, it can be a burden too. Especially if she’s not comfortable with those tasks.

Rather than feeling like she’s lucky to have control, she might feel that you’re pushing off unpleasant decisions and jobs onto her. Be sure to balance it by taking over things that she doesn’t like to do. This type of marriage is wife led in the sense that she has the major amount of control.

But a popular fantasy for many men is to have a truly wife led relationship. They become quite submissive to the wife in everything. They do the chores and anything she tells them. And serving their wives in this way pleases them a great deal.

The submissiveness even carries over their sex lives. In fact, that’s the big appeal for many men in having this type of relationship. They secretly want to be dominated sexually, and the rest just adds to that appeal.

In a true wife led relationship, the man knows that she has authority over him. He does the chores and tries to anticipate her every need. She doesn’t thank him, but may tell him he’s doing a good job.

When it comes to sex, the man is only allowed as much pleasure as the woman feels like letting him have. And not allowing him to have an orgasm, or delaying it, is something these men find enjoyable.

A relationship of this type isn’t for everyone, but many men feel happiest when their wives have control. And while it might sound like the woman has it made in a wife led relationship, it’s not always easy for her either.

If a woman has been raised believing in the typical roles of husband and wife, suddenly being asked to take charge of everything can be daunting. Granted, the housework and other chores will probably be done by the man. But the handling of the big decisions, finances and other things might be a new experience.

Some women may not enjoy it, at least not all the time. But if the man really wants that, a compromise could work where certain days or periods of time are spent with the wife taking charge.

If you would like this kind of relationship but don’t know how to ask your wife, you may want to write your feelings down. Or you could start behaving as if you’re in a wife led relationship and then bring it up by asking her if she likes your behavior.

If you are trying to get woman back, but you were a jerk to her, you may not deserve her. That may not be what you want to hear but it may very well be the truth. It is good that you recognize that you may have had a problem but what are you going to do about it and why should she want you back? Until you figure those things out you may not get woman back.

Here’s what you need to do to get woman back:
1)    Change the way you look at women. If you consider them property then you do not deserve a chance. View them as people deserving of respect and do your best to give it to them and you might have a chance. To love women you need to respect women.
2)    Change the way you treat women. Chivalry is not dead. Be a gentleman and treat them as queens. If you can pull this off your chances improve. Be subtle about it and try not to draw attention. You don’t want to look like you are faking it. They will notice. Women are smart like that and if she doesn’t notice she will have a friend notice and tell her. Your credibility may be shot.
3)    Learn humility. This will go a long way towards helping you get woman back.
4)    Let her know that you were a jerk. If she tells you that you were, just agree with her. If she exaggerates, or it seems like she is, remember that to her she isn’t. The only person’s opinion that matters is hers if your goal is to get woman back. You’re selling and you’re trying to get her to buy. The customer is always right.
5)    Find out if she wants some space or if she wants you to come begging and then give her what she wants. This will be a tough thing to do. You may have to ask around to people who know her well.  She may even think that your efforts to try out are worth giving you a second thought.
6)    Try and convince her friends that you are changed. You will have to do this first. They will be skeptical of you and will be most interested in protecting their friend that you hurt. If you can win her friends then you have won the major part of the battle. If you try and get ex back first, you will have trouble convincing her and even if you do, they may talk her out of it. Do you want her trusted friends for you or against you?
7)    Don’t tell her that you have changed, show her. Words are great but it doesn’t mean anything unless there is some action to back it up. You need more than words.
8)    Think about the long term and if you are going to be able to make this change permanent. If you can’t then you are going to end up in the same place you are now but only with a smaller chance to get woman back.

Getting an ex back is hard if you were the one being dumped.  But imagine how you would feel if you were the one who did the dumping?  That is the position that Aimee found herself in and she had to go about getting an ex back.

Aimee’s so called friend Renee told her that her boyfriend Jaime had been sleeping with another woman.  Without verifying the information or even asking Jaime about it, Aimee confronted Jaime and accused him of having an affair.  This took Jaime by complete surprise because he had no inkling that the rumor was circulating, and he didn’t do a good job of defending himself.  Aimee unceremoniously dumped him.

A few days later, Aimee found out that Renee had been lying for her own jealous, petty reasons.  Now Aimee was in a quandary.  Getting an ex back was important to her, but she also wanted to save face.

Aimee called up Jaime and explained what had happened.  But Jaime was in no mood to take her back.  Aimee had hurt him by not trusting him and not even talking things over with him.

Getting an ex back took all of Aimee’s wiles.

First of all, Aimee wrote Jaime a long letter of apology.  She took responsibility for what happened and promised that it would never happen again.  She reminded Jaime that they had a long history together and that they had shared some beautiful times.  She said that she didn’t want to throw all of that away.  She told him that the reason she acted the way she did was because she loved him and couldn’t stand the though of his being with another woman.  The thought of losing him forever was painful.

After she had mailed the letter, she didn’t bother him with constant texts or phone calls.  She figured that getting an ex back after a situation like this one required that she give Jaime his space.

When she did run into Jaime, she was as nice as she could be.  She worked positive memories into the conversation casually.  She didn’t apologize any further though.  She had told him both in person and in writing that she was sorry and let it go at that.

One day, Aimee got tickets for Jaime’s favorite band which was in town for one concert only.  She asked Jaime to go with her “just as friends.”  In this way, she opened the door to a future relationship without crowding him.

Getting an ex back after you have behaved badly and dumped him is difficult.  Not only do you have the embarrassment of having to apologize, but you almost have to start from scratch again on the relationship.  Rebuilding the trust is a key component in this period.

Jaime and Aimee did eventually get back together.  Jaime came to see that Aimee’s outburst was the act of a jealous woman who deeply loved him.  He saw it as a mistake that they could both grow from.  Their relationship became stronger than ever.

Aimee took the right approach to getting an ex back.

John wanted to get an ex girlfriend back. John was a veteran of the war in Iraq and he knew that he had to make a battle plan to get an ex girlfriend back.

John’s ex, a woman named Macy, broke up with him because she had met someone else, in this case a poet. John knew that while Macy had an artistic streak, she wasn’t going to ultimately be happy with someone whose idea of a good time was rhyming couplets. In short, the poet wasn’t the kind of man that John was.

So, John set out a battle plan to get an ex girlfriend back. There were three prongs to his approach.

The first thing he did was to smooth out the rough edges on himself. He let his crew cut grow out and had a short stylish haircut. He also started reading some of the books Macy had mentioned in the past. He figured that to get an ex girlfriend back, he had to be the kind of boyfriend she wanted.

The next prong of attack was to show her that he was a virile man that other women wanted. He called up Sarah, a friend of Macy’s, and asked her if she wanted to go to dinner as a casual date. When she said yes, John texted Macy and asked where Sarah might like to go on a date.

Macy immediately called John and wanted to know why he was taking Sarah out. John told her that they were broken up and he was moving on. He had always thought Sarah was an interesting person and thought it might be a good time to get to know her. If Macy had any objections, maybe she should reconsider the break up.

Macy slammed down the phone, which John expected. But he had planted the idea with Macy that he was a desirable guy. This was all part of his get an ex girlfriend back strategy.

The third prong of attack was to use the date with Sarah to get information back to Macy. John was the perfect gentleman on his date with Sarah. He brought her a single rose when he picked her up. He took her to a nice restaurant. And, on the date, he talked about the fabulous books he had been reading lately.

Then, when he dropped her off, he gave her a hug and a kiss on the cheek but didn’t go any further. The next day, he sent her a lovely bouquet and said “I had a really good time. I hope you did too.”

Sarah, of course, was on the phone with Macy immediately. She wanted to know why Macy had broken off a relationship with such a great guy.

Meanwhile, the luster had gone off the relationship with the Poet, and Macy was missing John a lot.

Macy called John a couple of days after his date with Sarah and wanted to know if the two of them could try starting up their relationship again.

That, my friends, is how to get an ex girlfriend back.