Because you are reading this article there is a good chance that you and your girlfriend have just broken up. If she dumped you because of something you did, you probably want to know how to get her back. However, it is important to remember that she is not a prize you are trying to chase. She is someone you love, and you surely don’t want to hurt her. So, take heed to some advice on how to get your ex back.

The first thing you need to do is understand what it was that made her leave you in the first place. If it is something obvious then this is an easy step, but if it is something not so intuitive you will need to do a few things.

The best solution would be, of course, to talk with your ex. However, sometimes it might be wiser to approach her friends first. Your ex girlfriend has probably talked about your break up to her friends, and they may be able to give you some answers.

Now, that you hopefully know the main reason for your break up, it is time to admit for yourself that it was wrong what you did, whatever it was. This is very important if you want that your ex girlfriend forgives you.

If possible, sit down with your ex and discuss the issues, and what specifically you have done to cause her to break-up with you. Now, you may need to allow some time for her to cool off and reflect on your relationship before you approach her.

One way to approach your ex is also through her close friend. You can ask her to tell your ex how sorry you are, and that you want to talk with her.

Never act arrogant or macho. This is the surefire way to expel her for good. Be gentle and move slowly. Listen carefully what she wants to say to you. Be sincere with your apology.

Do not speak at her at your place or any area you frequented. A coffee shop is always nice, or a park perhaps. If you think the conversation may become heated then select someplace with some privacy where you both can let your emotions flow.

You however, need to keep you cool and not be on the defensive. It’s alright to show some emotion. It will let her know you care. But refrain from yelling or pointing out her flaws.

Listen, understand, and confirm. It is important that your ex believes you have understood the reasons why she broke up with you. She also wants you to be sincerely sorry about your doings.

So, here was some tips that should help you to get your ex girlfriend back without playing any head games. Remember that it is you who needs to correct things, not your ex.

When you have been dumped, there are any number of theories about how to win ex back.  Most of them involve playing head games with your ex.  But, when you mess with her head just to win her back, you are on a shaky foundation for moving forward in the relationship when things are patched up.  This article is the no-games way to win ex back.

When you were going out, she would text you two dozen times a day.  Now your phone is silent.  While you don’t want to overdo it, calling her once a week or so just to “keep in touch” keeps the door open for a reconciliation.

To this end, make sure that you call her on important days like her birthday.  Sending a card or a small gift wouldn’t hurt either when you are trying to win ex back.

Keep in touch by email.  If there is a news story she might enjoy – whether it is about poverty in Africa or a profile of Shane West – send it to her with a nice (short) note.  You can also start a email list where you send out information, jokes, or personal updates to a group of friends and make sure she is on the responder list.

You also have to decide whether you want to want to date other girls during the period when you are trying to win ex back.  If you are serious that you are going to win ex back, you won’t date other girls.  If you are even thinking about getting back together, do not sleep with another woman.  This goes against some dating advice that says you should date around to make your ex jealous.  But playing games like this will not serve you well when you do get back together.

Don’t be jealous when she dates other guys though.  She called it off, remember, so she’s not cheating when she sees men.  You can use the information about what she looks for in a man when you analyze the kind of men she’s dating.

For instance, if she broke things off with you because you had gotten too complacent in the relationship, she may be seeing men who sweep her off her feet.  If you were the beer and football type and she’s now dating artists and poets, you may need to develop a more sensitive side in order to win ex back.

When you analyze and study the woman who broke up with you, you will be able to see what she really needs in a man.  Remember, that now that you are no longer a couple, there are layers being built up between the two of you.  In some ways, this actually makes it easier to see what she needs from a man because your own emotions, feelings, and needs are less at play.  Read into the things she says and the things she doesn’t say.  Look at her actions as well.

Hold your own cards close to your chest.  The power in your relationship has shifted.  When you spill out your deepest emotions to your ex, you give her too much power.  If you tell her that she is the one person who you need in your life, she suddenly can dictate the future.  When you hold your own cards close to your chest, you preserve your own power which is necessary for restoration of the relationship after you win ex back.

During the time when you are broken up, work on yourself.  Make sure you hit the gym regularly so you look good.  Get a hair cut too and even consider a new style.  Also, work on your mind as well as your body.  By spending time on self improvement, you become more attractive to your ex.

The bottom line is that you can try to get your ex back by playing games or you can try to fix the problems that your relationship had.  When you work on the problems, you build a more solid foundation for the future when you have already accomplished win ex back.