Did your girlfriend break up with you?  You are not the first guy to go through this.  In fact, girls initiate three quarters of the break ups while guys only dump the girl in one quarter of the situations.  Therefore, guys have to deal with being dumped far more often than girls do.

Compounding the problem is the impression that men are supposed to deal with their emotions stoically.  While women are allowed to dissect every part of their relationship, men are expected to roll with the punches.

But this doesn’t mean that men don’t have emotions.  They hurt when women dump them.  A girlfriend break up is quite painful.

First of all, men tend to place more value on stable relationships than women do.  While a man might be interested in a fling with a woman who is not his girlfriend, what he really wants is someone who will be there in good times and bad.

But, once your girlfriend has dumped you, it’s important to figure out how to pick up the pieces and go on with your life.

First of all, you should find some way to express yourself.  Girls can do this by writing poetry or talking about the relationship endlessly with their friends.  Men often don’t feel comfortable with these options.  But, if you play the guitar or piano, try writing some music that allows you to express your feelings.  Many of the great songs are about the pain of breaking up.

Next, you need to clear out your place of all of the things that remind you of her.  If she has clothes at your house, give them back.  Throw away her toothbrush.  And, if she’s given you any gifts that you want to keep, box them up for the time being until you can look at them without having turbulent emotions.

You will want to close off communications with her, at least for the short term.  If either of you owe the other money, try to settle up so that won’t be an avenue for talking.

Then tell your ex that you want to go silent for a while.  That means no calls, texts, or emails.  Stay off each other’s myspace and facebook pages.  In time, you may be able to be friends again, but right now you both need to give each other the space to heal.

Then, you need to get out of the house.  Make a point of playing pick up basketball with your friends.  Go out to a bar from time to time.  Become a big brother to an underprivileged kid.

Then, start to get back into the dating scene once again.  At first, you can have casual dates that may not lead to anything.  But, over time, you will meet someone you really care about.  And, at that point, you will know that you have some closure about the old relationship.  You won’t be worried about the old girlfriend break up any more.

Are you in love?  Breaking up with your boyfriend can be the most devastating thing in your life if you were truly in love.  How can you get through this situation?

First of all, you need to determine whether the relationship is truly over.  There are a number of ways to get an ex boyfriend back.

You don’t want to chase him.  You want to give him some space, especially in the first days after a break up.  So, don’t pester him with calls or texts.  Instead, let him call you.

If he doesn’t contact you right away, don’t stress about it.  Instead, after about a week, call him yourself.  But, keep it casual.  Don’t go all weepy on him and ask him to get back together.  Also, keep it short.  Five or ten minutes should suffice.

If you are still in love after this amount of time, you need to consider making more fundamental changes.

For instance, do you need a makeover?  Would a new hairstyle or new clothes attract him back?  Do you need to lose a few pounds?

Also, consider whether there were aspects of your personality that drove him away.  Were you always nagging him?  Did you drop all of your own friends and hang around with him exclusively?  You may have been crowding him.

If you have identified areas where you can change, you need to do them.  It may take time, but if he is truly in love, break up won’t last.

But, you also have to be prepared to move on.  Fortunately, any changes you make to win your ex boyfriend back will also help you attract a new guy.  For instance, learning not to nag a man will help you keep any new boyfriend.  And, your new more glamorous self will be sure to attract lots of attention.

Use the time between boyfriends to find out what you really want in a man as well.  What was it that attracted you to your ex?  Did these qualities hold on over time or did they annoy you after a while?  Did you go for someone on the basis of looks only to find out that made for a very vain man?  Did you like his sarcastic sense of humor only to find out that he turned it on you?

You should also use this time between boyfriends to figure out what you want in yourself.  What can you improve – not for the sake of a guy – but to make the quality of your own life better?  This may mean getting back in touch with your girlfriends, taking up a class, or going to church again.

Remember, love break up do happen.  Sometimes you can get back together and sometimes you can’t.  The important thing is to be able to roll with the punches and move on to the newer, better you.

A few situations in life are a huge struggle and one of them is how to successfully get girl back and keep her after you’ve messed up big time!

So what did you do?  Did you cheat?  Were you neglectful?  Selfish?  Or just unlucky? The questions could go on.  Whichever or whatever you did, if you seriously want to get girl back, you’re going to have to sort yourself out!

It’s no doubt going to be tough for you, but I’m going to suggest something counter-intuitive: leave her alone!  Give her some time to herself.  You never know, she might well realize that she misses you and agrees to starting up the relationship again all on her own.  Don’t dismiss this possibility, even if all looks lost right now, equally don’t cling to it as a possibility.  If it happens it happens, if it doesn’t it doesn’t!

However, if what you need to get girl back is a much more direct and hands on approach then again, take some time out and use that time to get your head straight.  By default, you give her some time to think also and put the whole thing into much needed perspective.

So, find your friends and spend time with them.  Make sure you’re not pestering her with emails and texts and accidentally trying to bump into her in the places where you know she hangs out.  This will only back fire on you and ruin your chances of getting her back, because she’ll only become annoyed with you.

If you neglected her, missed her birthday, hardly ever took her out, then you need to seriously look at that behavior.  No girl worth her salt is going to put up with such behavior.  A girl wants and needs, to be taken out and made a fuss of.  She needs to know that you want to be with her for more than the obvious. If you fail to show her that, then she will walk and find a guy who can show her that.

If all that you did was hang around with your friends and ignored her wishes, then again, you’re going to have to understand that this is not the way to treat a girl.  If you’re sure that you want a girlfriend then it’s time to fix up, look good and look sharp!  Start acting like she’s important to you.

To get girl back you now need to show her that you have understood her needs and you are ready and prepared to meet those needs.  Don’t mess up and try and get her back under false pretenses.  It won’t work for long and maybe when she leaves the next time, she’ll be gone for good.

Getting an ex back is hard if you were the one being dumped.  But imagine how you would feel if you were the one who did the dumping?  That is the position that Aimee found herself in and she had to go about getting an ex back.

Aimee’s so called friend Renee told her that her boyfriend Jaime had been sleeping with another woman.  Without verifying the information or even asking Jaime about it, Aimee confronted Jaime and accused him of having an affair.  This took Jaime by complete surprise because he had no inkling that the rumor was circulating, and he didn’t do a good job of defending himself.  Aimee unceremoniously dumped him.

A few days later, Aimee found out that Renee had been lying for her own jealous, petty reasons.  Now Aimee was in a quandary.  Getting an ex back was important to her, but she also wanted to save face.

Aimee called up Jaime and explained what had happened.  But Jaime was in no mood to take her back.  Aimee had hurt him by not trusting him and not even talking things over with him.

Getting an ex back took all of Aimee’s wiles.

First of all, Aimee wrote Jaime a long letter of apology.  She took responsibility for what happened and promised that it would never happen again.  She reminded Jaime that they had a long history together and that they had shared some beautiful times.  She said that she didn’t want to throw all of that away.  She told him that the reason she acted the way she did was because she loved him and couldn’t stand the though of his being with another woman.  The thought of losing him forever was painful.

After she had mailed the letter, she didn’t bother him with constant texts or phone calls.  She figured that getting an ex back after a situation like this one required that she give Jaime his space.

When she did run into Jaime, she was as nice as she could be.  She worked positive memories into the conversation casually.  She didn’t apologize any further though.  She had told him both in person and in writing that she was sorry and let it go at that.

One day, Aimee got tickets for Jaime’s favorite band which was in town for one concert only.  She asked Jaime to go with her “just as friends.”  In this way, she opened the door to a future relationship without crowding him.

Getting an ex back after you have behaved badly and dumped him is difficult.  Not only do you have the embarrassment of having to apologize, but you almost have to start from scratch again on the relationship.  Rebuilding the trust is a key component in this period.

Jaime and Aimee did eventually get back together.  Jaime came to see that Aimee’s outburst was the act of a jealous woman who deeply loved him.  He saw it as a mistake that they could both grow from.  Their relationship became stronger than ever.

Aimee took the right approach to getting an ex back.

How to win love back is a topic that I want to talk about today.  Too many people do this all wrong.  They think that they must aggressively pursue their ex in order to get him or her back.  In fact, nothing could be further from the truth.  If you want to know how to win love back, follow the advice in this article as closely as possible.

The first thing you need to know in the how to win love back arena is that you do not want to chase your ex.

Too many guys think they must pursue their ex’s.  They send hundreds of texts, call at odd hours of the day, and even stalk their ex girlfriend’s home.  They send flowers and gifts.

This is wrong, wrong, wrong because it makes you look desperate.  Women like Alpha males, not sniveling guys they think are jokes.  When you appear desperate, your ex girlfriend will start playing head games with you.  She’ll let you come over, and then invite a new guy over too.  She’ll pretend she’s interested only to go off in another direction.

And, the more you fall into this trap, the more games she’ll play.  This is not the answer to how to win love back.

Instead of chasing her and being desperate, you need to play games with her that make her come crawling to you.

When you are in a group that includes her, flirt with every girl but her.  If she has an enemy in the group, pay special attention to that girl.  By ignoring your ex, you make her want to come back to you.  You are reminding her of all of your charms, but not applying them to her.

It’s a good idea to go out on a date with one of her close friends.  Send your ex a text message saying “now that we’re just friends, I wanted your opinion on something.  Where should I take Mary to dinner after the big game?”  That is sure to make your ex girlfriend jealous and it’s one of the tricks for how to win love back.

Even if you don’t want to play head games with your ex, there is one thing that you can do that may help you in the how to win love back arena.  That is, you should be happy.

Girls like to date happy guys.  If you work on you rather than focus on her, you have a much better chance getting her back.

Go work out at the gym.  Hang with your buddies.  Get involved in a hobby you never had time for when you were dating her.  Go out on dates.  Even if you have to fake being happy initially, you will soon realize that you really are happy.

This way, whether you get the girl back or you move on, you will be a happier person.

And, that is my advice for how to win love back.