OK, so you say that you “want my wife back” that’s great, because really life is to short to live being down in the dumps when you are without that love of your life, that you chose to marry! I know, there was a time when I said “want wife backI want my wife back” too…

Marriages break up for many different reasons, and the reasons for yours is something that only you can answer, however they are generally based around the same things, one being a lack of understanding of the opposite sex, although we feel the same, we do think very differently. Not understanding this does lead to rather significant communication breakdowns, and then disrespect…

The first rule of thumb to getting your wife back is all about working on yourself, if you are making contact with your wife, and trying to convince her to get back together, I recommend for now, you stop! The best thing is to create some thinking time, and also emotional repair time. Obviously when you go threw something like this, deep down we become emotional wrecks, it is time to honestly reflect on the real reasons why you broke up, and honestly work on the issues that effect you, taking notes really helps to get things in prospectus, don’t rush as this is very important for when you attempt communication…

Secondly you need to concentrate on your positive well being, get yourself out and about having some fun, not so you can brag about it, but so you feel miles better. Go to the races, or a fishing trip or two, some hunting or whatever it is that gives you some excitement. Not only will this help you to feel miles better about life, it will show to others that you are positive and happy, and your wife will feel that you have moved on. Who knows once you have done this you may feel that you don’t want your wife back, and you were just holding on to her love for some moral sanity…

However becoming a happy man again is of up most importance to achieving your goal! The next step is to focus on some effective communication, and realizing this huge factor for why we get this wrong. That is that there can be no blame in your breakup, but just reasons why, that need to be dealt with. The most dramatic communication fault that we have is using the word “you” instead of the word “I”, in emotional debates. An example to this is, lets say you are having an argument and get angry, we begin a natural defense and will often say, “well you are making me damn angry”, as apposed to saying simply, “I am becoming rather angry at the moment”. Saying it differently does not have the same impact, as to when you sound like your blaming. When you are feeling that you are angry, you should immediately take time out, before you blow things out of proportion, and think of the reason for arguing…

Last but not least you need to be confident and positive, all I mean by this is to stop saying “I want my wife back” and start believing that you are going to get my ex wife backget my wife back. What we think does have huge impact as to what we get!

Understanding just how to get your ex boyfriend back can often be a hit and miss affair and it’s no wonder, because as a rule we’re not taught this stuff.  We either have to make it up as we go along, or rely on our friends to help us out. But guess what?  Our friends equally have no clue how to help us and they’re also making it up as they go. But the reality is that it simply takes using a proven plan and then taking action on that plan, for you to win back your boyfriend.

Your first step should always be to distance yourself from your ex and this is an action to preserve your sanity as much as it to make a statement to your ex boyfriend.  This step will stop you fixating on your ex and give you the space to concentrate on your own needs and requirements to help you get through this stressful time.

Make a serious attempt to reconnect with your family and friends and accept any help that will undoubtedly come from those who love and care about you.  If you’re serious about figuring out how to get your ex boyfriend back it would be a huge mistake on your part to isolate yourself.  With people around you it means you’re not sitting at home crying and obsessing about the breakup of your relationship or your ex boyfriend.

Now, as you’re spending time with family and friends, find out from them what they saw as the downfall of the relationship.  I’m sure your boyfriend would’ve told you what he thought as he walked out, and you no doubt have your own ideas on what went wrong and why.  However, sometimes it takes the perspective of an outsider looking in to make sense of a relationship.  So if you seriously want to figure out how to get your ex boyfriend back then ask others for their opinions.

Your next move is to make sure that given what you’ve heard back from family and friends regarding their take on the breakup, that you now think for yourself. You either agree or disagree with what’s been said and of course you’re doubtless going to get different opinions from them all.  So take some time to weigh up what’s been said and the final decision is yours.  Yes you started out wanting to get your ex boyfriend back, but is it still what you want?  Perhaps you’ve heard some ‘truths’ that now put that quest in doubt?  Perhaps you’ve had time to come to terms with the breakup and you can more readily accept it?  Whatever and wherever you are, be clear on what you want before you make the next move.

If you’re still determined to go ahead and win him back, then your next move is to call him and to do so calmly and without emotion and drama and talk to him about the way you feel.