No matter who you are, how old you are, where you live or what your yearly income you have something in common with everyone else on the planet… we all want to love and be loved.

Not terribly profound, I know, but if it is such a basic need, why do so many people struggle to find love and to keep it when they do find it? What is the secret to finding and keeping love?

Well, believe it or not, it’s really not nearly as hard as we make it. It can be boiled down to a few basic concepts. Once you have these concepts understood (and under control) you will not only have a much easier time finding that perfect person for you, you will also have a much better chance at keeping your love alive.

Here are a few points you must understand and accept:

1. If you are flawed you will attract / fall in love with someone else who is flawed. Now, don’t get me wrong, none of us are perfect. But I am talking about the deep seated issues that many of us have.

In many cases we aren’t even aware of what those issues are, but we can recognize that something is going on.

If you always seem to have “bad luck” it is because of your underlying issues and beliefs and the choices you make because of those beliefs. That’s it, whether you believe it or not. Change your underlying feelings and beliefs and you will begin to change your outcome.

It’s as simple as that but just because it is simple, doesn’t mean it will be easy. Identifying those limiting beliefs will be the first challenge and then learning to let those unhealthy and incorrect beliefs go will be challenge two.

2. Once you are a “whole” person who isn’t perfect but have gotten rid of most of your issues, you can find another “whole” person to love. The truth is that most relationships fail because we pick the wrong person. Simple.

Again, we do this because of our own issues and feelings of worthlessness or that we need to be punished for something.

These beliefs can come from anywhere and we all have them. They could be something that got passed down (accidentally) by your parents or something you learned from friends or family.

By going through step one and identifying what issues you have buried… and dealing with them until they are gone, allows you to get rid of all the limiting beliefs that have held you back.

Take away that limiting belief and you can find someone who is worthy of you and someone you can spend a happy lifetime with.

So, don’t give up on your hope of finding and keeping love. Just look inward first. Making yourself the best version of you that you can be will actually make it easier for you to find a great love and increase your chances of keeping that love when you do find it.

Being in a loving relationship is one of the joys of life. However, most of them go through their fair share of ups and downs. If you happen to be in one of those down times, then a little relationship self help is just the thing you need.

The good news is that there are a lot of things you can start doing right to start patching things up. And even though things may seem really desperate right now, the truth is that almost any relationship can be saved if you’re willing to do whatever needs to be done…so let’s begin!

1. Just talk. A lot of people are surprised to find out just how many couples barely talk. They can live in the same house, and be in the same room with each other, but yet can go a whole day without uttering more than a few words. To make it worse, those few words are basically the same and have no real meaning to them. New research suggests that the more couples talk, the less likely they are to argue. It can be small talk about the weather, or how your day is going. It may not be easy at first, but the quality of your conversation will improve with practice.

2. Make eye contact. We’re not talking about a quick glance, but rather a deep, long look into each other’s eyes. A look that searches the soul and says “I care about you.” If you haven’t done this for a while, or if you generally have a hard time looking anybody in the eye, then this may be a bit uncomfortable at first. But if you are in need of some relationship self help, then this is a good habit to get into.

3. Spend time with each other. Just being together will help the two of you get to know each other all over again. If you like, you can plan “special” time together, such as dinner and a movie. However, you can also do things around the house together. It’s not so much what you as much as it is that you’re doing it together. But, don’t fall into the same old routine. Remember to talk and make eye contact from time to time.

4. Get in touch. No, we’re not talking about getting in touch with each other’s feelings (though that is a good idea, too). Instead, we’re talking about touching each other, physically. Not in a sexual way though, so calm down! A simple touch on the arm while talking, a quick shoulder rub, and a nice hug are just a few of the things you can due to connect on a physical level.

Doing these few things are a great way to get started on the right path to relationship self help. As mentioned, it may not be that easy at first, but it will be worth it. Once you start seeing the results, you will want to keep doing more.

There is a time in just about every body’s life where they have the desire, and say “want my ex back” and at this time we are generally quite emotionally unstable! And it is hard to be able to see any sense in figuring out the best way to get back an ex. There is a ton of advice and help on the world wide web, and many people want to find the answers with a magic solution. Spending countless hours reading tips and tricks over and over again! There is a strategy that can HELP you, and goes like this:

Take Time Out! With all those emotions and the need to want your ex back, it is common that all you want to do is let them know how sorry you are! And how much you love them, please give us another chance? This is natural, but not the best way, you need to understand that the both of you are hurt and confused right now! And your ex will need time to calm, as much as you do…

Understand The Reason! To get back your ex and move forward with your relationship, it is wise to spend time evaluating the real reason or reason’s why you broke up! Write things down so that all the problems become clear, this will help you to not only be able to figure out what will need to be different! It will also help you to know how to touch the emotions of your ex to get them back.

Become Happy With You! This is far to overlooked, and obviously not the easiest at this moment of time. But it is practically a must ingredient to win a lover back, everybody wants to be happy in love! Before you attempt to make contact with your ex, you should work on your own personal happiness. The best way to do this is by getting out and just do things that you enjoy, even if that means having a date with someone else. But you may be into shopping, or fishing, hunting, dancing with the girls, whatever just do it! And get your confidence back, that was attractive to your ex…

Agree With Breaking Up! Humans always want what they can’t have, after some time apart and you are feeling good, the best way to get the friendship back from your ex, is to agree with the break up! Often with doing this simple task at the right time, is enough to make them want you back. But if a little more work is required, then giving them a “hand written letter” telling them how sorry you were, and how much you miss there friendship, should invite a response. Do not mention anything about how you want them back in that letter though.

From being someone who knows how it feels to breakup with an ex, and have that same determination and want! I fully understand how important it is to go for that friendship first. When my heart was screaming out “I want my ex wife back” I made a ton of mistakes, that caused more rejection, and I felt like things were falling part! Until I learned this same kind of advice, so focus on friendship and work threw the problems you had with your ex first, as this will increase your chances to be happy in the relationship…

Finished with your guy?  Want to desperately get guy back?  Then you’re going to have to use a strategy that will help you get him back and not cause him to head for the hills!

Firstly remember that just because you want him back it doesn’t mean that he wants to come back.  If you’ve broken up before and your relationship has become a breakup/makeup merry go round, pretty soon one or both of you will want to one day get off that particular ride for good.  So, there is a chance that he might have reached this point, no matter what you now feel and want.

Secondly to get guy back you’re really going to have to look at the relationship as a whole, not just the parts you’re comfortable looking at, because only then can you begin to find out what’s causing the problems.

If you need outside third party help to scrutinize your relationship, then it’s always worthwhile getting that help.  If you have good and honest friends who will tell you what you need to hear, as opposed to what you want to hear, then talk to them.

You should also understand that to pull this off you’re going to have to stop acting on whim and emotion and start working a well thought out proven plan.  This is probably the most crucial step you will need to take, so get yourself under control.  Sit down and plan to do whatever it takes to stop yourself running around making things worse – stop calling him, texting him and trying to force him to see you because begging and pleading won’t work.

Instead, occupy yourself by getting out and meeting new people, take a class, get fit, whatever it takes to help you re-focus and approach the whole situation from a point of clarity and calmness, is what you need to do.

Especially take the time to look at why you want to get guy back, because to be honest, too many people find themselves back with their exs only to discover a few weeks down the line that they have made a huge mistake.  So just because you want to get guy back right now, ask yourself if you really should?

If you’ve come to the conclusion that getting this guy back is the right move for you, then once you have yourself under control and you’ve thought things through, then your next move is to call and talk to him.

Understand that he may very well need more time before he is ready to speak to you never mind, entertain the idea of rekindling your relationship.  Your goal, if this happens, is not to force the situation.  Instead, tell him that you understand completely and then tell him you will give him more time to think things through.  Leave it at that and continue living your life and keeping yourself busy.