The break up happened six months ago and you are still saying, “I miss my ex“. You are also wondering how this is even possible. He hurt you badly by having that affair and when you broke it off you thought you would be done with him forever.

You now have two choices. You can try to get him back or learn effective ways to get over him and get on with your life.

If you choose to try to get him back then you have to ask yourself two very important questions. If he comes back will he just hurt me again? And, is he worth taking back? The answer to these questions are, if he hurt you once he will probably do it again. Especially if he does not think he did anything wrong in the first place. So the answer to the second question is fairly obvious, no, he is not worth taking back.

You need to figure out why you are still saying, “I miss my ex“. Is it because you still love him or do you miss the drama of the relationship? If you know deep in your heart that he was no good for you and you just miss the drama, my advice to you would be to get some counseling. Counseling is not a bad thing. Having been where you are I can tell you it was the best thing I have ever done in my life.

A good counselor can work with you to change the things in you that make you attract all the losers you have attracted your whole life. Maybe you do not think you are worthy enough to have someone decent in your life. A counselor can help you work through the things that have affected your self-esteem and help you see yourself in a different, more positive, light.

Once you start to feel more confident you will miss your ex less and less. You will start to realize that you are better off without him and that no one deserves to be hurt the way he hurt you. You can finally stop being a doormat and take charge of every aspect of your life, including your love life. Make an appointment at your salon and get a new hairstyle, go shopping with the girls and buy a new outfit or two. Start going to different clubs when you go out with the girls.

With all your new found confidence, you may just start to see that you attract a different type of man. There are men out there who like a confident woman, a woman who can seemingly do anything she puts her mind to. Just remember to not fall back into those same old tendencies of being a doormat when it comes to your relationship. Stay strong and confident and one day you will think back and wonder why the heck you hung on to that loser and almost embarrassed yourself by saying, “I miss my ex”, for so long after your break up.

Are you in love?  Breaking up with your boyfriend can be the most devastating thing in your life if you were truly in love.  How can you get through this situation?

First of all, you need to determine whether the relationship is truly over.  There are a number of ways to get an ex boyfriend back.

You don’t want to chase him.  You want to give him some space, especially in the first days after a break up.  So, don’t pester him with calls or texts.  Instead, let him call you.

If he doesn’t contact you right away, don’t stress about it.  Instead, after about a week, call him yourself.  But, keep it casual.  Don’t go all weepy on him and ask him to get back together.  Also, keep it short.  Five or ten minutes should suffice.

If you are still in love after this amount of time, you need to consider making more fundamental changes.

For instance, do you need a makeover?  Would a new hairstyle or new clothes attract him back?  Do you need to lose a few pounds?

Also, consider whether there were aspects of your personality that drove him away.  Were you always nagging him?  Did you drop all of your own friends and hang around with him exclusively?  You may have been crowding him.

If you have identified areas where you can change, you need to do them.  It may take time, but if he is truly in love, break up won’t last.

But, you also have to be prepared to move on.  Fortunately, any changes you make to win your ex boyfriend back will also help you attract a new guy.  For instance, learning not to nag a man will help you keep any new boyfriend.  And, your new more glamorous self will be sure to attract lots of attention.

Use the time between boyfriends to find out what you really want in a man as well.  What was it that attracted you to your ex?  Did these qualities hold on over time or did they annoy you after a while?  Did you go for someone on the basis of looks only to find out that made for a very vain man?  Did you like his sarcastic sense of humor only to find out that he turned it on you?

You should also use this time between boyfriends to figure out what you want in yourself.  What can you improve – not for the sake of a guy – but to make the quality of your own life better?  This may mean getting back in touch with your girlfriends, taking up a class, or going to church again.

Remember, love break up do happen.  Sometimes you can get back together and sometimes you can’t.  The important thing is to be able to roll with the punches and move on to the newer, better you.