If you have just broken up from a relationship, whether it was a long marriage or just a few months of dating, either way you are probably feeling bad about it and wondering if there is any way to get an ex back.  Most people will wonder this when they break up from a relationship but are still in love with their ex and the good news is that there are things that you can do to get your ex back.  Along with the many things that you can do, there are also many mistakes that you can make, so here are some of the things you should avoid if you want to rekindle that lost love.

1. Don’t constantly harass their friends.  It is tempting to harass your ex’s friends to find out what she is up to or if she is dating anyone else.  This is just annoying to her friends and as such they will probably just complain to her about you and not have anything good to say.

2. Don’t stalk your ex.  Don’t follow her around or turn up at her favorite hang out spots.  Don’t sit in your car outside her house and watch her every move.  Don’t text her 500 times a day telling her you love her and want her back.  If you stalk her all you will do is annoy her and perhaps even begin to scare her and you could end up getting in trouble with the law over it.

3. Don’t harass your ex’s new partner.  If she is seeing someone else don’t harass him and try to cause trouble between them.  Don’t try to convince their new boyfriend that she’ll never love them as much as she loves you, this will only make you look desperate and sad.

4. Don’t call your ex’s employer.  If your ex is avoiding your calls don’t try to get her to talk to you through her boss.  Also don’t call her boss to ask questions about her.  All you will achieve with this is to get her in trouble and possibly even lose her job.

5. Don’t call her every change you get.  I know you just want to talk to her and try to work things out but if you call her constantly she will get sick of it and even angry.  She might just need some space right now so you need to give her that.

6. Don’t use anything they say against them.  You won’t win any fights by bringing up every little thing she said or did in the past and use it against her, particularly if you exaggerate things and make them much worse than they actually were.

These six points are things to avoid when you are trying to get your ex back.  You want to get her back, not drive her further away so be careful in your approach.  You want to give her some space and use that time yourself to decide what approach to take. It can be difficult playing the waiting game, but it will be worth it in the end.

Are you in love?  Breaking up with your boyfriend can be the most devastating thing in your life if you were truly in love.  How can you get through this situation?

First of all, you need to determine whether the relationship is truly over.  There are a number of ways to get an ex boyfriend back.

You don’t want to chase him.  You want to give him some space, especially in the first days after a break up.  So, don’t pester him with calls or texts.  Instead, let him call you.

If he doesn’t contact you right away, don’t stress about it.  Instead, after about a week, call him yourself.  But, keep it casual.  Don’t go all weepy on him and ask him to get back together.  Also, keep it short.  Five or ten minutes should suffice.

If you are still in love after this amount of time, you need to consider making more fundamental changes.

For instance, do you need a makeover?  Would a new hairstyle or new clothes attract him back?  Do you need to lose a few pounds?

Also, consider whether there were aspects of your personality that drove him away.  Were you always nagging him?  Did you drop all of your own friends and hang around with him exclusively?  You may have been crowding him.

If you have identified areas where you can change, you need to do them.  It may take time, but if he is truly in love, break up won’t last.

But, you also have to be prepared to move on.  Fortunately, any changes you make to win your ex boyfriend back will also help you attract a new guy.  For instance, learning not to nag a man will help you keep any new boyfriend.  And, your new more glamorous self will be sure to attract lots of attention.

Use the time between boyfriends to find out what you really want in a man as well.  What was it that attracted you to your ex?  Did these qualities hold on over time or did they annoy you after a while?  Did you go for someone on the basis of looks only to find out that made for a very vain man?  Did you like his sarcastic sense of humor only to find out that he turned it on you?

You should also use this time between boyfriends to figure out what you want in yourself.  What can you improve – not for the sake of a guy – but to make the quality of your own life better?  This may mean getting back in touch with your girlfriends, taking up a class, or going to church again.

Remember, love break up do happen.  Sometimes you can get back together and sometimes you can’t.  The important thing is to be able to roll with the punches and move on to the newer, better you.