Understanding just how to get your ex boyfriend back can often be a hit and miss affair and it’s no wonder, because as a rule we’re not taught this stuff.  We either have to make it up as we go along, or rely on our friends to help us out. But guess what?  Our friends equally have no clue how to help us and they’re also making it up as they go. But the reality is that it simply takes using a proven plan and then taking action on that plan, for you to win back your boyfriend.

Your first step should always be to distance yourself from your ex and this is an action to preserve your sanity as much as it to make a statement to your ex boyfriend.  This step will stop you fixating on your ex and give you the space to concentrate on your own needs and requirements to help you get through this stressful time.

Make a serious attempt to reconnect with your family and friends and accept any help that will undoubtedly come from those who love and care about you.  If you’re serious about figuring out how to get your ex boyfriend back it would be a huge mistake on your part to isolate yourself.  With people around you it means you’re not sitting at home crying and obsessing about the breakup of your relationship or your ex boyfriend.

Now, as you’re spending time with family and friends, find out from them what they saw as the downfall of the relationship.  I’m sure your boyfriend would’ve told you what he thought as he walked out, and you no doubt have your own ideas on what went wrong and why.  However, sometimes it takes the perspective of an outsider looking in to make sense of a relationship.  So if you seriously want to figure out how to get your ex boyfriend back then ask others for their opinions.

Your next move is to make sure that given what you’ve heard back from family and friends regarding their take on the breakup, that you now think for yourself. You either agree or disagree with what’s been said and of course you’re doubtless going to get different opinions from them all.  So take some time to weigh up what’s been said and the final decision is yours.  Yes you started out wanting to get your ex boyfriend back, but is it still what you want?  Perhaps you’ve heard some ‘truths’ that now put that quest in doubt?  Perhaps you’ve had time to come to terms with the breakup and you can more readily accept it?  Whatever and wherever you are, be clear on what you want before you make the next move.

If you’re still determined to go ahead and win him back, then your next move is to call him and to do so calmly and without emotion and drama and talk to him about the way you feel.

Getting dumped by your boyfriend is no fun and if you’re still in love with him then you’re probably desperately trying to find help on how to get your ex boyfriend back.  Following the tips I’m about to outline for you is a great start that will set you on the right road to winning him back.

The worst thing that you can do in your quest to understand how to get your ex boyfriend back, is to get desperate and needy.  Desperate and needy spells out of control and high maintenance.  Boyfriends hate out of control and high maintenance because it means they never know what you’ll do and where you’ll do it and so they’re never at ease.  Letting your ex boyfriend see that you’re out of control is a surefire way to drive him away, so if this is you, you need to stop.

Not only that in this state, you hand over far too much power to your ex boyfriend and you could find yourself taken advantage of big time.  So if you want him back, don’t set yourself up for a possibly painful and frustrating time.

What you should also avoid is to make yourself too readily available to your ex as you try and work out how to get your ex boyfriend back.  Show him that you value and have pride in yourself and that you’re not sitting home waiting for him to call.  Get out and about and show him that you’ve got your life together and that you’ve taken the breakup in your stride.  Having him believe anything else makes your goal to get him back an up hill battle that you will probably lose.  So don’t sit at home obsessing about what he might or might not be up to.  Get yourself out!

If you want to get him back, make sure that you’re looking after yourself.  After all, you need to give him something to want to come back to and that means not letting yourself go.  Instead of staying home consoling yourself with chocolate and soda make sure that you hit the gym and keep on hitting it!  Start eating healthily and be sure you’re always looking your best when you’re out and about.  Not only will all of this make you look good, but it will do the world of good for your self-esteem which has no doubt taken a huge blow through all of this.

Now everything outlined works together, so if you’re after the best results don’t apply each step in isolation.  They all impact on each other and that’s how you should use these steps when you’re trying to understand how to get your ex boyfriend back.