It seems like every time we turn around there is a new book or magazine article about relationship break up advice. The truth is that finding out the best way to deal with a breakup is information virtually every one will need at some point.  Whether you want to try to get your ex back, or just move on with as little pain as possible, it will take time (and having some friends around won’t hurt either).

The length of the relationship will often determine how long it will take you to move on. Most of the time, though not always, the longer the relationship and the more memories and baggage you have the longer it will take for you to stop grieving and feel like you want to meet someone new.  Even if they cheated on you or did something really bad, it will more often than not still take quite a bit of time for you to finally separate from them emotionally.

Even though we may wish we could at times, we can’t just flip a switch and turn off all the love and companionship we’d been feeling for such a long time. We will need to edge away slowly, in baby steps, until finally we can stand on our own and we’ll have moved on. The first step to this process is to get away. Maybe not literally, but figuratively. Put away all the pictures and mementos the two of you collected during your time together. Don’t call them or accept their call if they call you. You need space and time.

Everyone is different, for you it might be easier to have some friends come over and pack everything up all at once and put it in the attic.  For others it may be easier to do it in small steps, a little each day until it’s all out of sight. There is no wrong way, as long as it gets done.  Even doing something like redecorating or painting may help you get the fresh perspective that will help you.

If you’ve been meaning to buy new furniture or paint the wall in the living room, now may be the perfect time. For one thing it will give you something to do, something positive, that will keep you at least a little distracted. Another thing is that you will be changing the look of your environment which will make it a little easier to forget and move on.

No one is suggesting that a coat of paint on the wall or a new couch will make all the pain go away, but it might give you something else to focus on and take away some of the things that will trigger the painful memories of the two of you watching movies or doing the crossword puzzle on Sunday mornings. Those little memories of the seemingly unimportant times are the toughest to forget.  The best relationship break up advice I can give you is to keep moving forward in life, surround yourself with friends and family and hang in there, it does get better.

Keeley knew it was time to be moving on.  Break up with her boyfriend Joe had just happened.  She knew there was no chance of getting back together, so she had to get on with her life.

First, Keeley tried talking to her friends about the break up.  At first, they were sympathetic.  But soon, they became bored with the topic and wanted to talk about their own issues.  Keeley became frustrated at their lack of support.

Her mom, on the other hand, couldn’t talk about anything but Joe.  She thought Keeley was insane to let him get away.  It sometimes seemed like her mom had been more in love with Joe than Keeley ever was.

After a few weeks, Keeley decided to go to a therapist for five sessions.  Over the course of a few weeks, she began to identify the problems which had led to the break up and plan out a strategy for moving on.

The first thing she did was to for the moving on break up was to get rid of all of Joe’s things.  Some, like the leather jacket he loved, she gave back.  Other things like his toothbrush she just threw away.  And, he had given her some nice jewelry, but she decided to box these up and store them until she became less emotional about Joe.

Next, she started doing things that she didn’t feel comfortable doing when Joe was around.  For instance, Joe would never go to the ballet with her.  Keeley had trained as a classical dancer and she appreciated Swan Lake and Giselle.  When a performance came to town, she got a couple of girlfriends together and they went.  This is not something she would have done if she had been together with Joe.

She also decided to join an adult dance class.  Partially, it got her out of the house two nights a week.  It also got her back into shape.  But, she was able to meet new people as well.  She liked the comraderie of the class.

She also explored new passions.  She never knew much about fine wines.  Joe had preferred beer and she had usually just ordered the house white.  But when she heard a local winery was offering a wine tasting class, she decided to join.

Over the course of five weeks, she developed a palate.  She began to appreciate the difference between a young wine and an old wine.

And, she met Rodney.  Rodney was a good looking lawyer who was interested in good wine and fine food.  He was also interested in Keeley.

Part of how Keeley knew that she was getting over the pain of losing Joe was that she was interested in Rodney.

Keeley doesn’t know whether the relationship with Rodney is going to be long term or a short term rebound fling.  But she does know that she doesn’t miss Joe when Rodney is around.  And that’s moving on break up advice!

Good relationship break up advice is surprisingly hard to come by. The reason this is surprising is because break ups are something that almost everyone goes through at some point. Now granted, some people do find their sweetheart in elementary school, marry them as teens and then live on happily together well into their old age.

These are not people to get good relationship break up advice from. Not that people whose longest relationship could be measured on a wristwatch are good advisers either. But even aside from these two extremes, the average person is not a good person to get relationship break up advice from.

The reason for this is that most don’t really have a clue why their relationships ended or what to do about it. This isn’t their fault, either. The truth is, most break ups are simply too painful to allow people to get the right kind of perspective they need. The hurt feeling and broken hearts make it too hard to see the lessons that are there to see.

The best relationship break up advice is the advice that stops a break up dead in its tracks, or at least helps you get your ex back. Honestly, you don’t need much advice if you don’t want to get them back, unless you’re trying to find advice on how to burn their clothes or what kind of key works best on car paint.

But if you need good relationship break up advice, the kind that gets you back with your ex, then you’re reading the right article. You may not believe that you can get your ex back, but it is possible, even if it isn’t exactly easy. You will need to do some work to get back together, but it can be done.

The first step is to get some distance from the relationship. Basically, you need to get away from your ex’s memory and their presence. This may seem like strange relationship break up advice when you’re trying to get someone back, but it’s a necessary step. You need to be able to stand back from the relationship and look at it without your emotions getting in the way, which is crucial to the next step.

The next step, in this case, being to figure out why the relationship fell apart to begin with. You can’t do this if you’re still broken up over it. This isn’t an invitation to assign blame; you just need to be able to figure out what the problem is so you can work around it.

Once you’ve done both of these, it’s time to start getting back into the relationship. Ask your ex to go to coffee or some other non-threatening kind of activity. Do not talk about your relationship unless they bring it up. What you’re trying to do is rebuild, and you’re going to need to take it slow.

After this, the best relationship break up advice you get is to treat the new relationship with your as a new relationship. You need to treat this as something brand new, not just an extension of the old relationship. If you need more relationship break up advice, there are several excellent resources available on the web, you just need to be willing to take that step to save your relationship.