Ex Wants Back Together – But I Don’t

Friday, January 8th, 2010 at 2:19 pm

So your ex wants back together but you don’t? That is an incredibly difficult position to be in, especially if you have reasons to keep the peace or are just still interested in being friends. You want to make sure that you don’t cave into the pressure to get back together, though. It might be the right thing but you need to examine the reasons that you broke up in the first place. If you aren’t totally convinced that it is the right thing then you really should not. We will be looking at two of the big reasons that you may have broken up and could very well be why you shouldn’t get back together again, even though your ex wants back together.

One of the things that could be why you broke up in the first place is that you have your eyes set on getting married and don’t believe that they are “the one” for you. Your ex wants back together but you may have found out that they aren’t, for some reason, what you are looking for in a spouse. You have certain ideals and certain things that you are looking for in a marriage partner. While you were dating, you found out that this person didn’t have what you needed.

It doesn’t matter what exactly the reasons are, it is something that you can’t see yourself living with the rest of your life. If you have realized that they aren’t what you need, then why waste time on on a futile effort if it is only going to detract from your ultimate goal of getting married. You will only be putting off the inevitable future break up and possibly missing out on finding that one that you really should be with. Your ex wants back together but it simply wouldn’t be the life time commitment that you crave so deciding not to only makes sense.

Another reason that it might not be a good idea to get back together with ex even though your ex wants back together is you simply just don’t have the feelings towards them that you had at one time. If there are no other good reasons for being together, children together being the main and most important one, then it really isn’t fair to either person. Both of you deserve to be in a situation better than one person being “stuck” with the other. You deserve to not feel so obligated and they deserve to not be with someone who would simply rather not be with them.

If your ex wants back together, while it may seem the easiest solution to get back together, it may not be the best one. Look closely at the reasons that you broke up in the first place. If you are convinced that they just aren’t right for you then don’t feel pressured into doing something that ultimately would do neither one of you any good. Don’t do the wrong thing trying to do the nice thing and get back together because your ex wants back together.

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